the lingering sound of yesterday roams around, seeks for the ones who fell apart.
i have concluded our story, felt the sun touching my skin without paying my debts.
so here we are back on the banned trays that willlead on to the beginning of the end.
dealdy irony. all the same.
reset to zero. move the clocks back.
I am reverting to my habits.
Track Name: Reflected
i have been watching you for years. saw you beating your head against the wall, just to see if you still feel.
every day you have spent in isolation trying to level out love and hate/ considering that luck has overlooked you/your innocent heart turned almost black.
we live and learn. plunge down into hell to feel heavenly once again. every temporary death of feelings will be your birth again.
so all i do is comparing me and you. i have been watching you for years, watched you change/you watched me do the same.
you will learn the hard way as long as solitude brings you peace.
black and white have run together into your everydays grey.
that's the prize you have to pay. and i can't seperate: i was just like you.
Track Name: Dazed
- Instrumental -
Track Name: Unfulfilled
he last four notes of this song are dying away.
these notes come and go. They seem to whisper: „just do the same, suffer in time.“
and that's what i pretend, to feel the pain to the beat.
no compassion. full purity.
every line set in my mind is carving into familarity with this world.
there is no pain. only appalling silence while booze is gnawing away at every bone.
i recognize there is only me/ a shell suffused with a soul striving for perfection.
breaching blue ceasefire. for the first time those nottes ring true:
the sound of the world's tender apathy.
i miserably failed to comprehend how fucking similar we are, how fucking fraternal we are.
taken in oblivion of being, i have failed to phrase the question if this is the life i am destined to live.
so this song's last four notes are dying away:
just as my self-indulgence.
Track Name: Detached
i see the sky about to rain / vicious cold settles in my bones.
will this rain wash away what i carried so deep inside? erase the fear that has been asleep?
i have been the bitter one for far too long, but now everything went wrong suddenly falls into place.
every „i am sorry“ might not be too little too late.
every footprint i left on the ground to cover the distance revalues into the hardest part of the lesson i have learned.
so i am waiting for the driving rain that will sort out my longing for escaping this/ make sense of my habits, my sins and failures.
and when the first raindrops come down i recall bit by bit that without fear there are no feelings, without feelings there is no life, without life there is no beginning and without beginning there is no end.
rain infests my soul/washes away my agony of mind.
i can't persist in error.
i always used to shelter from the yesterdays, from the eternal recurrence of the past.
protecting my injured heart.
i have to confess i was too blind to see my fears clearly proof
that i am alive.